Paternal Instincts
by Jordana Amore
Summary: Olivia's father makes a dramatic entrance into her life, leading Elliot on a determined mission. Ch 7 now up. Complete. Please read and review.
1. Chapter One

Alright, here we go. This is my second attempt at a story. Hopefully I've grown.

Yes, I know we don't know who Olivia's father is and either does she so I took the liberty of making him up. I think I covered all my bases and avoiding stepping all over the real story line with her father, but we'll see. Remember, its just a story so don't jump all over me about what would really happen...its TV none of this would really happen.

Disclaimer: I don't own anything or anyone. Accept for the things I made up. Characters ain't mine. They belong to Dick Wolf and the good people at NBC.

**Chapter One: Martin Becker**

Elliot yawned yet again. "You wanna call it a night?" Olivia asked glancing over at her exhausted partner.

He tried to rub the sleep out of his eyes. "No, I'm good."

"Elliot you look like crap."

"Thanks for the honesty," he laughed. "Its almost six thirty in the morning, we've been out here for over ten hours," he reminded her. "Why aren't you tired?"

"Me? I have super human abilities, remember?" she joked. He smiled and rolled his eyes. She wrapped her arms around herself and shivered. It was surprisingly cold for a May day. "I'm too cold to be tired," she admitted.

"Alright," he sighed turning on the car. "Lets go. This guy isn't coming home."

"I'll see you Monday," Olivia said as she slammed the car door shut.

"See ya Liv," Elliot called out the car window. She was so eager to get out of the chilly New York air that she practically jogged up the stairs to her building. She didn't even notice the man watching her from across the street. Elliot pulled out of the spot, catching a glimpse of the man as he did, but not thinking anything of it.

* * *

There was nothing to do Monday morning but paper work. Fin and Munch got David Sweeney Sunday afternoon as the suspected rapist tried to sneak back into his apartment. He was presently being arraigned. Olivia slouched back in her chair and sighed. Days like this could be so boring. 

"Olivia Benson?" a man asked approaching the detectives. Olivia slid her chair back and stood to face him.

"Yes," she said professionally. The man smiled at her strangely, observing her carefully, taking her in. "Can I help you?" she asked politely as she studied him. A tall balding white guy in his late fifties.

"I need to speak with you," he answered. "In private," he added lowering his voice. Olivia looked up at Elliot, who was the only other person around. He nodded at her and walked away, but he didn't go too far. His curiosity got the best of him and he found himself standing just a few yards away observing his partner and the stranger.

Olivia gestured to the man and they both sat down. "My name's Martin Becker," he started carefully.

Elliot watched them talk for a minute or two. He saw the man put something down on Olivia's desk. Her mouth fell open and her eyes widened. She pushed her chair back and started to back away from him in shock or fear. Elliot couldn't tell which.

"I'm sorry. Please," Martin begged nervously. Olivia turned suddenly and rushed out of the squad.

"Olivia," Elliot called as she brushed past him. She didn't stop. The man stood by Olivia's desk shaking his head in regret. Giving up, he sighed and exited the station house.

Knowing he shouldn't and that it was none of his business, Elliot walked over to Olivia's desk to look at the thing that had caused the commotion. He picked up the driver's license, it was almost yellow with age. The name on it made his heart stop in shock. "Serena Benson."


	2. Chapter Two

**Chapter Two: Family Ties**

Almost ten minutes later Olivia returned to the squad. It was obvious she had been crying. She sat quietly at her desk as if nothing had happened. Elliot sat opposite her. Her mother's driver's license lay face up on the desk. When her eyes settled on it Elliot could see the sadness in her eyes. She grabbed the license, threw it in a draw and returned to her paper work. Elliot watched her, not knowing what to say. He didn't know exactly what was going on, but he knew if it involved her mother it had to be painful for Olivia.

"Liv," Elliot started warily.

"Hm?" she said without looking up.

"Olivia," he said, this time bringing her head up. He fumbled awkwardly with some papers in his hands. "What was that about? Who was that man?"

"No one," she answered averting her eyes from him.

"Olivia."

She sighed and threw her work to the side of the desk. "You looked at it?" she asked accusingly but not angrily. She crossed her legs and folded her arms over her chest as she leaned back. He nodded guiltily and she rolled her eyes. "Great," she muttered.

"What's going on, Liv?" he asked with concern. "Who was that man?"

Olivia shook her head and laughed like he wouldn't believe her if she told him. "Daddy." Her voice was disgusted and sarcastic at the same time.

"Wh-wha-?" he uttered in shock. He couldn't even manage a complete word.

"Yep," she said raising her eyes. "Martin Becker. Its not everyday a man comes into your place of employment and tells you he raped your mother a few decades ago," she said smartly. She leaned back again, stretching her arms over her head. She still couldn't believe it.

"How do you know its him?" Elliot asked once he found his words.

Olivia shook her head in disbelief and exhaled. "He explained everything and it all fits. No one else would know that stuff. I don't know, but I could just tell. His eyes," she answered. "My eyes."

"Wow, Liv, I, I don't," Elliot stuttered. "Why now?"

She leaned forward again. "I don't know-sudden hit of remorse, I guess," she snapped dryly. "He took her purse, license and everything, when he-" she said letting her eyes drop. "He had a friend who's a cop run the name, he found me, did the math, and checked me out." She put her hands over her face. "He actually apologized," she laughed with disbelief. "He wants to get to know me. He said he wants to get to know me," she said with disgust. "God, that makes me sick."

"So what happened?"

Olivia shook her head. "Nothing. And nothing's gonna happen. I don't want to ever see him again."

"I thought you always wanted to know who he was?"

"I did. And now I do." She thought for a moment. "I wanted to solve the case for my mother, see his face, know his name, but I never wanted to get to know the man. He's my mother's rapist, Elliot."

"He's your father," Elliot returned. Olivia flashed him a telling look. "Sorry," he quickly added. They went back to work, but only for a few minutes.

"Do you think people could change?" Olivia blurted out to break the silence. Elliot locked eyes with his partner.

"Honestly?" he started. She nodded, why would she ask if she didn't want a straight answer. "No, not truly. I think you could alter your behavior, maybe break some bad habits, but your still the same person at heart."

"So no matter what kind of spiritual epiphany a guy undergoes, he's still a rapist," she said. Elliot didn't answer, he just gave her a sympathetic look. "God," she sighed. "I didn't need this, Elliot. I came to terms with the circumstances of my life a long time ago-I was over it. I can't do this now." She rested her head in her hands and thought over the whole bizarre thing.


	3. Chapter Three

Hey, I know my chapters are short but they're going to be often, so bear with me. Thanks to those of you who reviewed so far, it keeps me going :) Um, yeah, so here's chapter three. Let me know what you think.

**Chapter Three: Meet the Partner**

A couple of days past and although she couldn't get him off her mind, Olivia hadn't mentioned Martin Becker again. Thinking about him was keeping her from sleeping at night and focusing in the day, and her distracted demeanor was obvious to her co-workers. No one knew but Elliot and he made it a point not to bring it up. He hoped Martin Becker would just do his daughter a favor and leave her alone.

"Aren't you suppose to be in court?" Elliot asked his partner as he settled himself in at his desk.

"Yes," she said frantically rummaging through her desk. "I came in early to finish some things up and now I can't find my damn car keys." She groaned and continued to toss things over on her desk. Elliot let his eyes scan her cluttered desk and then leaned over.

"Here," he said brandishing her car keys and a wide grin.

Olivia stopped her frantic search, snatched the keys and let her arms fall to her sides. "Thanks," she sighed, a little annoyed with herself for not being able to find them.

"You've been kind of scattered lately," Elliot told her.

"I know, I know," she replied curtly. She grabbed the rest of her stuff. "Alright I'm out of here. Bye." She quickly disappeared, leaving Elliot worrying about her at his desk.

It was about 10:30 that morning when Martin Becker walked into the Special Victims Unit squad room. He approached Elliot's desk. "Excuse me," he muttered to get the detective's attention.

"Yeah," Elliot said lifting his eyes. When he saw the man he stopped what he was doing. She was right she does have his eyes, he thought. That deep dark gaze, the kind you could get lost in, was unmistakable. "Olivia's not here," he said in a deliberately icy tone.

Martin nodded. "Oh." He stood awkwardly still. "Are you her partner?" he asked finally.

"Yes I am," Elliot answered. Just then he realized he had seen the man before. He narrowed his eyes at the man. "You were in front of her place last week?"

"Yes I was," Martin admitted guiltily. "I wasn't there to hurt her or anything like that."

"I think you should go." Elliot tried to a get a feel for the man. He seemed shattered, disturbed-probably by guilt, the detective figured. He looked innocent enough, like he wasn't capable of hurting anyone, but that was obviously not the case. Martin couldn't even look a person in the eyes when he spoke to him, and to Elliot that meant a person couldn't be trusted. You only avoid the eyes when you have something to hide. Furthermore, Elliot knew people didn't change and that gave him all the reason he needed not to trust the man.

Martin lowered his head in shame. "She told you everything?"

"I think you should go," Stabler repeated.

"I just wanted to see her. I just wanted to know what my daughter looks like," Martin replied pleadingly.

Elliot stood up. "You raped and impregnated her mother, that doesn't make Olivia your daughter. You have no right to do this to her." His voice was firm and his eyes flashed with anger when he spoke.

"Please," Martin begged. "I was just a stupid kid back then. I was so lost and into drugs I didn't even realize what I was doing half the time. But I've changed. Please, I just want her to know that. I spent some time locked up and I got turned around. I'm straight now. I'm not that man anymore, and what I did," he said shrilly swallowing the lump in his throat, "it kills me-everyday I have to live with it. I know I can't take it back, but I wish I could every single day. I really do." He was almost in tears.

"People like you don't change. If you really wanted to do something about it, why didn't you turn yourself in? Instead you waited till you got caught for some other screw up to grow a conscience." Elliot returned nastily. Martin didn't answer. "That's what she needed, that's what her mother needed before she died. Look at what Olivia does for a living. Everyday she locks up scum like you, trying to make up for what you did. And you got away with being a scumbag because you were too afraid to own up to what you did, to really take responsibility for it. And now you have the audacity to come here looking to her to make you feel better! You don't deserve to know her. You have no right to even speak to her!" he spat.

"I know, I know," Martin cried. "I'm sorry. I'm so sorry." He ran his hand over his head. "Would you just tell her I came by?"

"No," Elliot answered flatly. "If she wants to talk to you she'll find you, but you," he said pointing at the man, "you stay away from her, or so help you God." With that Martin Becker left the 16th precinct.

Later that afternoon Olivia returned. Elliot didn't mention Martin's name. He didn't want to cause her any more stress. But after finding out Becker had done time he ran his name, something he thought he should have had the sense to do as soon as Olivia told him about the man. Martin Becker did twenty two years at Riker's for murder in the second degree. He was released two months ago. "How was court?" he asked as she came in. She shook her head and rolled her eyes. "That bad, huh?" he laughed. She nodded. He debated if he should tell her about her father's priors. He decided not today.

"So what have you been up to all morning?" she asked throwing her coat over her chair.

"Nothing," he said nonchalantly.

She looked at him for a moment, sensing there was something up. Giving up she sat down at her desk and started to work. "Oh, did I tell you," she said looking up. "My completely changed father has a criminal record." Elliot looked like he was surprised but really he was amused. Sometimes they really did think alike.

TBC..soon.


	4. Chapter Four

As promised here's the next chapter. I told you I'd update soon. Thanks again for the reviews. Let me know what you all think.

**Chapter Four: M.I.A.**

Two weeks had passed since the day Martin Becker first entered Olivia's life and he had barely been discussed since. Elliot never mention the man's little visit last week. He figured Olivia was better off not knowing. It was risk. He knew how upset she would be if she found out her partner was keeping things from her. They had that argument in the past. She told him they could never work together if they couldn't trust each other. But this wasn't about trust, it was about what is best for her. He trusted her, everyday he trusted her with his life. He was just trying to protect her. Still, he knew she wouldn't be pleased.

The detectives were called in early that morning. It wasn't even four thirty in the morning when Elliot's ringing cell phone woke him up. The Captain explained the urgency. A congressman's daughter, Jody Kendall, was brutally raped and beat and the commissioner wanted a suspect in custody as soon as possible. The victim was taken to the hospital where doctors and her family were nervously waiting for her to wake up.

By a quarter after five o'clock Elliot's car came to a screeching stop in front of a crime scene on an almost abandoned Manhattan street. He slammed his door shut and looked around as he made his way over to the Captain. He was surrounded by shady looking buildings and rundown apartment houses. "What the hell was a fifteen-year-old doing over here in the middle of the night?" he asked once he reached Cragen.

"That's what we're here to find out," the Captain answered. He looked tired. These late, or rather early, calls were hard on a man his age. "Where's your partner?" he asked Elliot.

"Olivia's suppose to be here?" Stabler returned stepping under the yellow crime tape.

"Yeah. I called her right after I called you. She said she would be right over. When she didn't show right away, I thought maybe she needed you to pick her up." Elliot shook his head trying not to think about how his partner's father, a convicted murderer and admitted rapist, had just entered her life. "We'll give her a few more minutes," Cragen suggested. Elliot nodded absently.

For thirty minutes Elliot collected information from the victim, responding officers, and the man who found the teenager unconscious and bleeding in an alley. He examined the crime scene and followed every professional standard correctly but he wasn't thinking straight. "Stabler!" He heard his name and turned his head from the spilled garbage cans that got knocked over in the struggle. Cragen walked over to him. "I've been calling you," the Captain told him.

"Sorry," he muttered. He ran his hands over his face trying to wake up and focus.

"Elliot, what's going on?" Cragen asked. "You seem distracted."

Elliot sighed. "I'm worried about Liv," he admitted.

"Elliot, she's a little late. It's probably nothing," Cragen said, careful not to be dismissive of his detective's concern for his partner.

The detective looked unconvinced. "I don't know. She didn't answer her apartment or cell phone, and it's not like her to be late." He proceeded to vaguely explain Olivia's situation to his superior. He knew she wouldn't want people to know the details of her life, although Cragen knew part already, but he felt her safety outweighed her privacy.

"Christ Elliot, when we're you planning on sharing this with me?" Cragen said once he finished. "Go to her apartment. I'll call Fin and Munch." Elliot nodded, thanked him and rushed over to Olivia's building.

* * *

"God," Olivia groaned throwing the phone next to her on the bed. She rolled over to look at the clock. The green digits flashed 4:22. "Great," she said under her breath as she sat up. She pushed the covers off of her and threw her legs over the side of the bed. Her body shivered once her bare feet touched the cold wood floor. She showered and dressed and was locking the door to her apartment at 4:45. Unconsciously she jingled her keys as she jogged down the stairs and over to her car parked in the garage under her building. She neared her car, still jingling her keys.

"I do that too." The voice startled her, causing her to drop her keys. She turned around to face her father, who was leaning against another car. Her hand instinctively went to her gun. "Don't do that," he said pointing a nine millimeter at her. He was just a couple of feet from her now. "I've been waiting for you. I wasn't too sure what time you leave for work." He smiled at her which made her sick. "Show me your hands," he commanded, like he was the one with the badge.

Slowly and reluctantly Olivia brought her hands up in front of her. She stood still, frozen, cursing herself for not being quicker, smarter, more aware. "So what's this, you come to get to know me?" she asked smartly. "Here's an insight-I don't like having guns pointed at me," she continued bitterly. She knew she should probably keep her mouth shut and just do what he says, but she was unable to help it. She hated this man with every fiber of her being. Just the sight of him made her sick to her stomach.

Martin narrowed his eyes and jerked his head to the side. Without warning he brought his gun holding hand forcefully across Olivia's face. She stumbled back against the car, her face stinging from the powerful blow. Tiny drops of blood dripped from the area just below her right eye. She wiped the blood away with the back of her hand. She wasn't sure why but she was shocked that he hit her.

"Shut up!" Martin cried. "I gave you a chance!"

"What chance? You gave me nothing!" she shouted, hoping someone would hear her.

"No, you don't get to do this. Get in the car," he ordered, waving the gun at her. "Now!"

He was clearly unstable and dangerous so Olivia quickly put any spontaneous heroic acts out of her mind. She had no choice but to obey. Martin bent down and picked up the keys Olivia had dropped. "Lets go!" he shouted when she didn't move. "And hand me your gun." He stepped closer to her. His gun was practically against her head now. Olivia didn't cower, but she gave him a glaring look as she grinded her teeth and shook her head in frustration. Slowly she took her gun from the holster and slammed it down in his hand. Then she made her way around the car and into the passenger seat. She figured she could run but he would probably shoot her. Martin threw the gun on the ground. He didn't want to give Olivia the chance to get her hands on a weapon.

"Where are we going?" she asked calmly once they had pulled out of the garage.

"I just wanted to get to know you," he said starring ahead with a wild look in his eyes. "I really was sorry."

"Okay, so why don't we go somewhere to talk," she replied. Her best chance was to appease him.

He laughed wildly. "You wanna talk? You wanna talk to me?" he asked menacingly.

"Yes, I do," she lied.

He wiped his eyes, he was crying. "Liar!" he shouted slamming his foot down on the gas.

"What are you gonna do? Kill us both?" Olivia cried grabbing her safety belt and strapping herself in.

Martin darted madly down the busy Manhattan street. Cars honked and screeched while pedestrians cursed and yelled. "No one gets it," he whimpered. "No one! I did my time and no one will give me a second chance! I said I was sorry! I changed! Its people like you," he cried taking a particularly crazy right turn that sent Olivia flying into the door. She looked over at her father and thought he'd be the last person she ever saw. She had always pictured the man who raped her mother as a cruel unremorseful monster, but Martin didn't fit that mold. He was probably just as cruel as she always imagined, but he didn't have that _I don't give a damn who I hurt _attitude. She almost wished he was the first type. That would make things so much easier. "You think your so much better than me!" Martin screeched suddenly.

"I am!" Olivia shouted back. If she was going to die she might as well go telling the truth. "You're a rapist and a murderer! Everyone's better than you! You can't do what you did and make up for it with a tearful apology _Martin_. It doesn't work like that." She spat her words at him with venom. She couldn't help it any longer. Her whole life she wanted to confront this man and now she was going to die at his hands. It didn't seem fair. He had shattered her mother's life years ago and now he was going to end hers. Olivia didn't find the irony amusing.

An eerie silence fell over the car and Olivia found herself wondering if anyone would notice if she died. Elliot was all she could come up with. She would miss him, she thought. "Where are we going?" she asked again. Martin didn't answer. He just drove with that terribly frightening wild look in his eyes.

After a few minuets they pulled up to a building that was boarded up. Signs on the surrounding fence read _under construction._ Martin turned the car off. "Come on," he said, once again showing her his gun. Olivia sighed like this whole terrifying life threatening situation was just a big inconvenience. She stepped out of the car and looked around for someone she could alert for help. "Keep up," Martin said grabbing her by the arm violently and pulling her along. "And don't even think about screaming."

TBC...


	5. Chapter Five

Hey everybody. Thanks to those of you who have reviewed. Chapter Five is now complete. Please enjoy.

Note: The words in italics are Olivia's thoughts.

P.S. I should have the next chapter finished by Wednesday, but we'll see...the semester's ending and its finals time so I'm kind of losing my mind with all the tests and papers, but I will try.

Please, let me know what you think of this so I could see what direction I want to go in.

Thanks,

Jordana

**Chapter Five: Father-Daughter Bonding**

Elliot made record time driving to Olivia's apartment. When his repeated and forceful knocking didn't bring her to the door he began to worry. He thought about kicking the door down but he knew he'd never hear the end of it if she wasn't actually in danger. He decided to check for her car first, so he ran the five flights down to the garage. He made his way to her parking space, J14, to find a vacant spot. The detective surveyed the area and kneeled down to examine something on the ground. He looked real close at the tiny liquid drops on the floor. Taking his handkerchief from his pocket he dabbed the spots. When he brought the white cloth to his eyes he saw red. Realizing it was blood he threw his head back in anger. _Where the hell is she?_, he thought. He ran his hand over his head and cursed Martin Becker under his breath. Feelings of worry and frustration overwhelmed him. He took his cell phone from his pocket and started to dial. Out of the corner of his eye he saw a piece of metal glimmer. He crossed over two parking spots and picked up Olivia's gun. His stomach dropped. Not only was she in danger, but she was unarmed. He continued to dial Olivia's phone number.

"You know I really love this father-daughter bonding thing," Olivia sassed. Martin was still leading her by the arm into some dilapidated building. "Lets do it again some time." Her word were met with a blow to the face. She fell back but Martin was still holding her so she never hit the floor. "Alright get the hell off me," she said struggling to free herself from his grip. She had enough of him. Olivia was not the kind of woman to take a beating from anyone. Martin tightened his grasp so much that it hurt. "Let go off me!" she screamed. She pushed at his shoulder and he hit her again. They continued to struggle and fight until a punch to Olivia's stomach sent her to the ground. As quickly as she hit the ground, he was on top of her. As he took her arms and pinned them to the ground a horrible look of fear flashed across Olivia's eyes. Disgusted with himself, Martin stood up, pulling his daughter with him. He continued to pull her along.

"I'm not that person any more," Martin said lowly. She felt a cold metal object against her back. "Just remember who's got the gun," he whispered. Olivia cursed the man as he dragged her into the building.

They stood in the middle of the half destroyed structure not speaking a word. Olivia surveyed the place, nothing in sight would be helpful to her escape. "Oh, an abandoned building-how original," she said under her breath rolling her eyes. Before Martin had a chance to react Olivia's cell phone rang. She didn't make any movement to answer it but silently awaited the direction of her father.

"Who is it?" Martin asked.

Olivia looked at the caller ID. "My partner," she answered.

"Give me the phone," he commanded. Olivia handed him the cell phone and he flipped it open. "Hello," he said pressing it against his ear.

"Who's this?" Elliot asked. He was still standing in Olivia's parking garage. "Martin?"

"You're a smart man Detective Stabler," Martin replied.

"Where's Olivia?" Elliot demanded. "If you hurt her, I'll kill you! I swear to God!"

Martin smiled. "That's sweet. Its nice to know my daughter has someone who cares about her. Friends, family-its important."

"Where the hell is she?" Elliot shouted. "Where are you?"

Martin turned his back from Olivia. "Don't worry Detective Stabler. I'll take good care of my baby girl." He threw the phone out of reach.

Elliot stood frozen in the middle of the parking garage. He didn't know what to do now. Martin Becker had Olivia and he had no idea where they where or how to find them. He called the Captain, who told him get in his car and start driving towards Becker's house. The other detectives would work at the station house to track her down. It would take a while to trace Olivia's phone to a cell site and they didn't have time to waste.

"So what do you think?" Martin asked Olivia with a smile as he looked up and around at the building.

"Of what?" she returned.

He closed his eyes with nostalgia and inhaled sharply. "This place," he answered proudly. "My father use to take me here when I was a kid." Olivia looked at the man like he was surely crazy. "It use to be a bowling alley. God, I loved coming here, just me and him." He walked around the building, pushing aside some scraps of wood as he did. "He was a great man, my father. Loving, caring, attentive. That was the kind of father I wanted to be." _So, if its not his father, he must have unresolved mother issues,_ she figured. _How typical?_ He ran his hand over what use to be the snack bar. "I didn't know about you Olivia," he said turning to face her suddenly. She shuttered at the sound of her name coming from his mouth. _He has no right to use my name. My mother gave me that name. _"I got out of prison and I was going through some of my stuff and that's when I found the driver's license-I didn't even remember taking it. I don't remember a lot from that period of my life."_ You mean the rape and murder period of your life, _she thought bitterly Martin continued, "I decided to look into that incident with your mother." _Incident? That's all it was to him? The bastard._

"Incident?" Olivia snarled.

"I felt bad about it-really. I wanted to make up for it," he said ignoring her comment. "But when my buddy checked into it he told me the woman from the license was dead. I thought that was it, but then he said she had a daughter. Your birthday is about nine months from that day-I remember that day because I was in the city for my father's 60th birthday party. Well, I did some research and here I am," he finished with a proud grin, like he had just explained Newton's Law of Gravity. _The nerve of this man, _Olivia thoughtangrily Everything he did turned her stomach, boiled her blood, made her sick. "I always wanted to be a father. You were like a gift from God. I'm sorry I wasn't there for you," he added sadly. "You know that, right?" Olivia didn't speak, she had nothing to say._ You don't actually expect me to answer that, do you?_ "Say something," he demanded pointing the gun at her.

"Yeah," she muttered lowly. She hated herself for dishonoring her mother by going along with Martin's sick ideas. _I'm sorry Mom, I don't mean what I'm saying. _

"Good," Martin said. "I know we didn't get to know each other and you're an adult now. There's nothing I can do for you now, I wish there was, but there isn't." _You could leave me the hell alone and get this gun out of my face._ "I can't be a part of your life. I hurt you too much-I see that. I see your in pain and I want to help you, I want to take that pain from you. I want to help my daughter." _This can't be good_. He turned away from her. It seemed like forever before he turned back around. "I wasn't a part of your life, but I could be a part of your death."

TBC... hopefully soon.


	6. Chapter Six

**Not to sound repetitive but thanks to anyone who reviewed. Once again, thoughts are in italics. I'll probably post the seventh, and most likely final, chapter over the weekend. But I can't be sure of anything yet. For now...enjoy chapter six. Thanks.**

**Chapter Six: Sorry**

Elliot raced to Becker's apartment to find it empty. He tore the place apart looking for some clue as to where the man was holding Olivia, or perhaps he did it just because he was angry. He found nothing. He had tried her phone again but there was no answer. The Captain had nothing. Munch and Fin were checking local hospitals and precincts. To make matters worse, they were having trouble tracking Olivia's cell phone site. It would be at least another thirty minutes before they got a location.

Elliot dropped his hands at his side with a heavy sigh. He couldn't believe this was happening. He kept imagining his friend hurt, or dead. It felt surreal. He stood in Becker's apartment thinking his friend was going to die and there was nothing he could do about it. It was an unbearably helpless situation. If only he had some direction, some clue as to where she might be. His body twitched with uncontrollable anger. He wanted to get his hands on Martin Becker just as much as he wanted Olivia to be safe. He wouldn't allow himself to be sad or scared though. Anger was a feeling he was comfortable with, not one he could control, but one he knew well. It pushed him; it drove him to continue looking. Sadness and fear were too overwhelming, too immobilizing. He couldn't be overwhelmed right now. He needed to be focused. He needed to find her.

What would he do if something happened to her? How could he get by without his partner, his best friend? No, he refused to think about it. He would find her before anything could happen to her. As soon as she was about to die he would swoop in and save her. He'd break down the door and get his shot off before Becker ever had the chance. He'd get there-just in the nick of time. He'd be the hero-he'd save the day. He had to. There was only one problem: he had no door to break down. Where the hell was she? He got in his car and started towards the station house unable to shake the helplessness.

Olivia's eyes met the barrel of Martin's gun. A sick feeling settled in the pit of her stomach and her knees felt weak. She struggled just to stand. _Oh God. This can't be happening._ "Martin, listen to me, you don't have to this," she said softly. "There's still time." _Elliot, where are you?_

"No," he cried. "There's not. You don't want anything to do with me. I'm disgusting. I'm scum." _You're right._

Olivia stepped closer hoping to ease the gun away from him. "No, that's not true. I want to know you Martin."She swallowed hard and lied, "I want to know my father." _Oh God, I can't believe I'm actually saying this. He's never gonna believe me. Please let this work. _She took another step.

"Why would you want to know me after what I did?" Martin was shaking with sobs. _Great, now he's crying. _"Why?" He took a few steps back, his hand still raised. "I tried so hard to get my life in order and I never could. Why would you want to know me?" _I don't, I want to live._

"Because you're my father," Olivia answered. _Okay, now I think I'm gonna be sick_. "I have your eyes," she told him suppressing the urge to vomit.

Martin's arm dropped and a small smiled spread across his face. "You do," he said proudly. Olivia relaxed._ Good._ _Oh, thank God. _

"Yeah, now come on," Olivia urged gently reaching for the gun. _That's it. It's over._

Just then Martin's head twitched and he stepped back from her. "No!" he screamed. "You're lying! You're lying!" The sick feeling returned in her stomach. _Damn it!_ _I was so close._

"No I'm not."

He shook his head furiously. "Yes. Yes you are." _Okay, yes I was._ "I could see it in your face. I make you sick." _Yes. You do._ "You hate me." _Yes. I do._ He wiped his eyes with the back of his gun holding hand. "I'm sorry I hurt you Olivia. I'm so sorry." He brought his arm down and lined up the barrel of the gun with Olivia's head. "Everything will be alright now." _No._

Martin's finger moved slightly, his hand dropping at the last second. The sound ripped through the abandoned building like fireworks on the Fourth of July. Olivia felt the burning metal tear through her insides. Her eyes filled with tears, her knees buckled and she silently fell to the floor clutching her stomach. Warm blood seeped through her fingers and shock turned into pain. It took a moment to register with her. It hurt, she knew that much immediately. The room started to spin and the sick feeling returned. She gasped for air and looked up at her father one last time as if to ask _why_.

Their eyes met just as he put the gun to his head. She wanted to scream out for him to stop but she couldn't find the words. He mouthed the word _sorry_ as he pulled the trigger once again. Olivia turned away in horror as her father's lifeless body collapsed in front of her.

She knew why he lowered his arm at the last second. He wanted to give her a chance. She saw it in his face. A shot to the head and she was dead for sure. A stomach wound she could fight through.

Olivia fought the urge to close her eyes. Everything kept spinning. She needed to remain conscious. _Elliot, where are you?_ With one hand pressed firmly against her bleeding stomach wound she painstakingly dragged herself across the wooden boards to find her phone. When she reached it she took it in her hand and turned onto her back with a cry of pain. It was unbearable. With bloody fingers she dialed 911. She struggled to keep herself awake. She recalled the street corner they pulled up to and once she told the operator her location she let her eyes fall shut. _Come on Elliot._ _Hurry, please._ Then it was black.

TBC...


	7. Chapter Seven

Alright, here's the last chapter. Please let me know what you thought of the story. Thanks for all the kind words. Enjoy.

**Chapter Seven: Here With Me**

The detectives sat in the station house still searching for Becker's hang outs, somewhere he might have taken Olivia. They had lost hope of finding her but no one was willing to just give up. Cragen was in his office alone when the phone rang. "Okay, thank you," he said curtly hanging it up. He brought his hand up to his head and sighed. Mustering all his strength and composure he walked out to talk to his detectives.

From the look on Cragen's face Elliot knew it wasn't good news. "What happened?" he asked bracing himself for the worst. He hated that it had turned into a waiting game. He couldn't stand not being able to save her. He should have been out there looking for her. Looking in every building in the whole damned city if that's what it took. In his mind he pictured the worst, but in his heart he hoped for the best. Still he was reduced to waiting, a pained nervous sort of waiting that was all he and the others could do.

"She's been found," Cragen answered grimly.

"Where is she?" Munch asked.

Fin stood up. "What happened?" he inquired.

Elliot looked terrified. His face a sickly pale white, his eyes wide with anticipation. "Is she hurt?"

"She's at Mercy Hospital. She's been shot," the Captain answered. The detectives looked at him with shock and sadness, like they had been the ones injured. "She's in surgery. They won't tell me anything else."

Elliot grabbed his jacket. "Lets go."

All four men arrived at the hospital a short time later. They were told to wait in the waiting area and that someone would be out to speak with them as soon as her condition was known. They sat, occasionally pacing anxiously, not speaking.

"Detectives," a young male doctor said approaching the four men. They all stood up. "Jody Kendall is awake," the doctor said. The detectives exchanged guilty glances. They weren't even thinking about the case from this morning.

"We'll go," Munch said. "Let us know how she is."

Fin followed, giving Elliot a firm comforting pat on the back as he passed. "She'll be alright. Liv's a fighter," he offered. Elliot just nodded.

Hours past. Fin and Munch were off investigating the Jody Kendall case. Cragen was called away from the hospital. The commissioner requested an emergency meeting with him to discuss the unit's progress on Congressman Kendall's daughter's case. Now only Elliot remained in the waiting area.

To pass the time he paced the small area repeatedly, practically wearing out the soles of his shoes. All he could think about was what he would do without his partner. Nothing-that was his answer. He needed her out there. He needed her to solve cases, to talk to, to make him laugh, to keep him sane, to keep him from losing it when a perp got to him, to get him through his separation.

"Detective Stabler?" Elliot picked his head up to see a middle aged woman in blue scrubs. "I'm Doctor Sanchez. I worked on Detective Benson," the woman said.

"Is Olivia alright?" he asked eagerly.

"She's out of surgery. It went well. We repaired the damage to her intestines and she should be out of here in a few days. She's resting now."

Elliot smiled in relief and exhaled sharply. It was the greatest news he had ever received. "Thanks. Thank you," he said shaking the doctor's hand hardily.

"Can I see her?"

"I'm sorry sir, family only for now."

"I am her family," he told Dr. Sanchez. His eyes pleaded with her. The doctor gave him a sympathetic look.

"Alright, I'll take you to her," she replied.

Elliot stepped cautiously into Olivia's hospital room. He stood a few feet in front of the foot of her bed with his hands clasped awkwardly in front of him. The only sound was the beeping of the machines Olivia was hooked up to. The sound was steady, the beep coming at a fixed interval. _That's good,_ he thought. _Her vitals are stable._ The room was small, dingy and white-a standard hospital room. Still, it had a depressing sour feel to it. God, he hated hospitals.

Olivia's eyes fluttered open and she warily adjusted them to the light. "Are you gonna say something or just stand there?" she asked fixing her eyes on Elliot. He lifted his eyes to meet his partner's and she smiled weakly.

Gingerly he walked to the side of her bed. "Hey, how you feeling?" he asked softly, barely audible. He didn't return the smile. He stood still like a stone statue.

"You know El, you won't kill me if you talk at a normal volume," Olivia returned. "Nothing's wrong with my ears. Speak up." She pushed her body up into sitting position.

He laughed, relaxing at bit. "Sorry." Elliot looked over the bruises on her face and had to turn away. "Liv, I'm sorry," he repeated, this time much more seriously.

"He's dead Elliot," she stated sadly. She didn't know why she cared about the man who tried to kill her. Maybe because he had given her a chance at the last minute. Maybe because she just wasn't the kind of person to take pleasure or solace in the death of anyone, no matter what they had done to her. Maybe because he was her father. The last possibility is what got to her.

Elliot nodded. "I know Liv."

"All he wanted was a second chance." Her voice was low and regretful.

He took her hand and gave it a slight squeeze. "Some people don't deserve a second chance." _Then how could we ever expect people to change? How are things going to get better? How is this world going to ever be any safer than it is now?_ She didn't voice her thoughts. She agreed with her partner, even though it was slightly pessimistic.

"You think you could stay awhile?" she asked hesitantly.

Elliot smiled and pulled a chair up to her bed. "I wasn't thinking of going anywhere."

"Good," Olivia whispered as she turned her head away from him and closed her eyes. "Because I need you here with me."


End file.
